Well what a time off mixed fellings
I have spent the weeked packing up my things and seperating that iam taking form the family home ready to move tomorrow.
its made me realize that alot of what we have is just stuff and this is a chanse for me to declutter iam only taking the bear minimum from the house as its my Boys home and i donot wount to leave it striped and them feel like there home is distroyed
Most of the things iam taking are my personal things hifi 1 off the 3 tv's my cd's cloths and tools far to many tools .
as i say its mixed feeling
Relif becouse i will be in my own home and away from the bitterness that i have lived with for
Sadness at leaving me 2 doys behined that is going to be very difficult to beal with
Freedome to be myself again with out restrictions not hiding the true me ( how long to full time i ask my self ??)
fear off being alone i no i have lived alone before but the thort of being alone is hared as i need some one to care for and would love to be care for in a loving relasion ship but that will have to be in the distant future as iam to much of a mess at this time
worry over money i no i will be ok in the long tearm but its going to be diffficult for some time setting up a new home from scrach is expencive and i admit i have expencive tasts in stuff .
but in less than 24 hours i will be in my new home wish me luck :-)